Book review: Validation by Caroline Fleck

Rating: 5/5.

I read this book because I wanted to understand better what validation is, how it can be used both to strengthen relationships and help driving change. I not only learned a lot but also enjoyed the author’s witty comments and writing style. The book explains in depth what validation is about, provides real-life examples and gives several frameworks to develop validation and self-validation skills.

Validation, as defined by Fleck, is the communication that one is mindful, understands, and empathizes with another person’s experience, thereby accepting it as valid. Put simply, validation shows that you’re there, you get it, and you care.

Change requires acceptance. The message that someone or their emotions are unacceptable can make change difficult and maybe the cause of many mental problems. Validation transforms how you feel, increasing trust, intimacy, and psychological safety. It influences people, helps drive change, and develops self-compassion.

Great read. Whether you have a leadership position or just want to be better at listening and connecting with other people, you should read this book.